A vacation, but not really

Nick and I could have had a relaxing vacation on a tropical island.

Instead we took the kids to Hawaii.



The two of us could have sipped Mai Tais by the pool and dipped in casually to cool off.

Instead we splashed, swirled, bobbed and sprayed with a mermaid, a ferocious shark and a downy duckling.



If the children had stayed home, we two could have dined on sushi and strolled back to the hotel at sunset with sand squished between our toes -- the fingers of one hand dangling flip-flops, the fingers of our free hands laced affectionately together.

Instead we ate Subway in the hotel room, tucked grouchy, sun-kissed tots into bed early and lazed on the couch, gulping in rushes of tropical air from the open windows.

We could have donned snorkels and flippers for underwater encounters with turtle families and schools of colorful fish.

We could have climbed Diamond Head and treated ourselves to a view of the splendorous Waikiki sands and the turquoise shoreline.

We could have toured the pineapple plantation, the Arizona memorial and stayed out late for a luau after dark.

But we didn't do any of those things. We had youngsters to care for.

So, instead, we watched hula dancers and imitated them back at the hotel.



We never walked past a plumaria or hibiscus blossom without picking it and tucking it behind our ears.



We found a playground and chased birds.



We buried our legs in the sand and jumped over waves.

We took early morning walks and afternoon naps.

We made leis and ate our fill of fresh pineapple.



Our week in Oahu with the family didn't really feel restorative or restful or very vacationy for that matter. It was hard-charging, blood-sweat-and-sometimes-tears, think-ahead-of-the-next-bend-in-the-road kind of fun.



For sure, it would have been a different trip if we had left the kiddos at home.



But because they were with us, we made some unique memories together--ones Nick and I will remember for the rest of our lives, even if our children won't.

At times, it felt truly magical to be there with them -- like we visited a fantasy land across the ocean, above the clouds where the mountains tower high on pillars covered in crushed velvet, the ocean always feels warm and the air smells like tropical flowers.

And I'm so glad I never once had to say: "I wish the kids were here to see this."